My Transformation: Why I Needed A Coach, Part IV

“Old Soldiers never die, we just change uniforms.”

Spending over half your life working in your chosen profession and then changing to something new doesn’t require a transition, but a transformation. We transition between positions at a job, but when you break a glass ceiling, a transformation is required. When we relocate from one location to another, that’s a transition. However, changing professions through retirement requires a transformation. In my article, Changing Steps: A Reflective/Reflexive Journey in Transition, I believed at the time that I was merely transitioning out of the Army. I even quoted the poet Voltaire, who said,

“What feels like death is but transition.”

At 51 years old, after nearly 32 years in uniform, retirement felt like death. Living in the cocoon of the Army for that long, I knew practically nothing about civilian life, so I needed a coach, though I did not know it.

Why I Needed a Coach

For expediency’s sake, our society believes in ‘one size fits all,’ which caters to the masses. I had escaped the masses long ago, so a week of being taught how to dress in business attire and complete a resume was basically wasted time and effort. Business attire was the uniform at the US Army War College, and retiring as a colonel did not require me to seek employment. However, that was the foundation of the Army Transition Assistance Program (TAP): Find a job and get back to work. But, returning to the salt mines was not on my mind.

And although, in the Army, you must request retirement 12 months before your departure, you were not given 12 months of transition preparation. In reality, within one month of your retirement, the Army might even ask you to extend your service because they have no replacement for you! I needed a coach because I was not transitioning but transforming myself professionally from an executive military leader to a newly minted member of a civilian community. So, the real question was: What now?

Coaching the Transformation

I needed a coach before I even decided to retire, but no one tells you/told me that. My hindsight was so clear several years after retirement that I wrote The Inspired, Not Retired Workbook: A Guide to Developing Your Leadership Lessons. The Essential Question in the retirement chapter is:

“What retirement planning have you done?”

My answer to the question for most people was, “Probably not enough.” I will share a few questions I wish a coach had asked me:

1. Is it your time to retire? I covered this subject in Chapter Three of Inspired, Not Retired: Leadership Lessons from Father to Son.
2. How deeply have you thought about retirement? Retirement planning is more than just focusing on leisure activities.
3. When do you plan to retire? Do not confuse this with question one. It may be time to retire from your current organization, even if you are not ready to do so. Also, your plan may not align with your ‘planning,’ or lack thereof.
4. Can you afford to retire? I asked this in a much nicer way than I wrote it in the workbook, but it is still highly important.

I developed the three pages of questions in the workbook while reflecting on what I wished I had known before retirement. Those three pages are what I wish a coach had asked me before departing the Army. Armed with that knowledge, I may have experienced a much better transformation to civilian life.

References:

Randolph, Jr. B. W. (2015). Changing steps: A reflexive journey in transition. Journal of Global Healthcare Systems,5(2).Retrieved from https://www.researchgate.net/ publication/321444948_ Changing_Steps_A_Reflexive_Journey_in_Transition

Randolph, Jr. B. W. (2019). Inspired, not retired: Leadership lessons from father to son. Amazon Kindle Direct Publishing

Randolph, Jr. B. W. (2019). The inspired, not retired workbook: A guide to developing your leadership lessons. Amazon Kindle Direct Publishing